Can You Turn Your Friendship into a Relationship?
The moment has come, and you understand that you will never find a more beautiful person who can make you happy. They understand you perfectly. They are always there when you want to cry or you are just in a bad mood. They are kind, the best, the most understanding, the most caring. A question arises in your head: why was I unable to see the person of my dreams in them before? Can a friendship turn into a relationship? To achieve reciprocity, you need to show and prove that you are truly in love, and you do feel something more than just friendly love to a person.
In this case, you have a lot of advantages over other people who are looking for a partner in life: you know all the pros and cons of a person you are interested in. You know what their tastes and preferences. Friendship before a serious relationship is the foundation upon which you will build something new, something stronger, and more beautiful. Therefore, if you use all the available information correctly and do your best to get a person interested in you as a potential partner, then turning friendship into love will not be difficult for you.
Your goal is to obtain the love of your friend. Your actions should revolve around trying to be more interested in their everyday life and their past, more precisely about their past relationships. It may happen that such questions will cause jealousy and anger deep within you. But, keep your emotions to yourself, this tactic is necessary if you want to find the answer to the question, “How to turn a friendship into a relationship?” If, nevertheless, negative emotions arise, then remember that ex-partners are a thing of the past, and now it’s your turn.
If you are sure that a person is emotionally ready to create a serious relationship, then you are ready for some actions. However, going from friendship to relationship isn’t always easy. So, how to move a friendship into a relationship?
How to Turn a Friendship into a Relationship?
How to transition from friendship to relationship? It’s actually not that hard. Building a friendship before a relationship is the hardest part, finding a friend and bonding with them is a lot harder than making a single step towards love. Psychologists say that pure friendship between a man and a woman is either a very rare thing or doesn’t exist at all. Of course, there are relationships that are completely devoid of sexual connotations, but there are some relationships that don’t have much sexual contact at all. True, it is quite hard to find a couple that doesn’t have sex and is yet satisfied with their relationships, but I digress. If you know for sure that a person is free, you have every chance to turn a friendship into a relationship.
What is needed for this?
You can, of course, simply and bluntly tell a person that you like them, and you want to date with them. But being this assertive can be quite hard for both men and women. Turning a friendship into a relationship is twice as hard for women because men are generally perceived as pursuers, women rarely act as the driving force behind a relationship. So, how should one tactfully make the first step?
Assess the situation
Can you analyze the role that you are playing in a person’s life? Friendship seems like a very simple concept and perhaps every single person that is reading this article will come up with a definition for the word “friendship,” but here’s a thing, all of these definitions will be different. There are friends with whom you just go out for a few beers, those that are rather colleagues than friends, those that are more than friends, people that have accompanied you throughout life and know a lot about you, etc. There are some cases in which the concepts of friendship vs relationship become indistinguishable, the main differences between them are mostly physical and intimate. To conclude this point, you should know your place in the life of a person before you decide to take this step.
Learn about their preferences
To hit the bullseye, you need to learn about your chosen one, their tastes and preferences as much as possible. Find a reason to talk to them about a partner of their dreams, about their plans for the future, about the traits they want to see in their partner. If there is nothing in these views that contradicts your principles – congrats, you are on the right track. But it is necessary to be able to get that information seamlessly, otherwise, you risk scaring a person away with your intrusive interest.
Start developing your usual outfits, don’t make any drastic changes, be subtle about it. If you are a good looking person and it’s the summer – you are one step closer to your goal than the rest of us, you will be able to show off what you’ve got and thus, increase the level of interest that a person has to you. This is a difference between friendship and relationship. Friends normally don’t show off their breasts and their six-packs to each other, it just seems weird, but if you happen to do it “accidentally” and a person doesn’t seem to mind your behavior – you are one step closer to your goal. Another thing that we should point out is that you should wear clothes that you find comfortable, don’t experiment.
Create provocative situations. If a person is your colleague, then find out the day on which they will spend some extra time on work, do the same and then ask them to give you a ride. Tell them that you need some help at your place. Such a request should not be too binding and complex in execution.
The main task is to create an environment in which you will be alone. Then proceed according to a situation. Offer a cold can of coke, treat them with something, make a compliment – close the verbal distance between you two. In a word, prepare the soil for future actions.
If there are no objective reasons to continue being just your friend and not a partner – a person of interest will most likely give you a sign that they want to develop your friendship into something else.
Friendship to Relationship: Main Stages
1. Consider if you are ready to potentially lose your friendship for a possible romantic relationship. Usually, after a step towards a relationship, becoming “just friends” again will not work. This is when sympathy comes into play, and a person begins to think about the future, the possibility of losing a person just like that. At the same time, it is not necessary to give up the opportunity to take the risk. It is important to come to understand that the probability of building a relationship is more important than the danger of losing a friend. Sure, there is some risk to such a decision, but friendship in a relationship will become even stronger if you manage to succeed in your mission, you were best friends before, now you are virtually inseparable. Friendship and relationship not only coexist, but they intertwine with each other and turn into something else, something magical, and wonderful.
2. Show your attention through open, romantic gestures, and facial expressions. Often, people forget that body language is an important component of flirting, which allows people to directly show their interest and assess the state of mutual feelings. All people are different, but there are a number of universal signs of respect and sympathy.
- People are facing each other.
- People maintain continuous eye contact.
- A person is constantly pulling on their hair or a piece of clothing.
- People repeat the gestures and phrases of each other.
- During a conversation, a person gradually moves closer to their interlocutor.
3. Use light flirting. Before you take the first step, you should evaluate the feelings of a friend. No need to go to extremes, it is enough to show your interest with subtle hints, and it may just be enough. Watch the person's reaction to your flirting – do they look away when you flirt with them or just laugh it off? In this case, you should better stay friends. If they seem to get away from your hints, they maintain eye contact or allow themselves to respond with romantic gestures of their own, then your chances for success are extremely high.
Here's how to start flirting
- Look into their eyes and smile. A smile is considered to be the most effective way to flirt. Overcome the barrier of touch: put your hand on their shoulder or back, pat your friend on the arm or hug them for longer than usual (2-3 seconds) to show your sympathy.
- Use sincere compliments to please a person. Everyone loves compliments, they are the signs of attention. Be more specific to make them more memorable, "Your last presentation was something out of this world!" instead of, "You're very smart."
4. Offer to have a date. Thoughts that you need to invite a friend for a date are very important for a potential relationship, so discard any doubts and embarrassment. Do not hesitate if you’ve made a decision. No need to invent anything sublime or romantic, just be sincere. Any answer is better than ignorance. Remember this when you try to find the courage and ask a question. Take a friend aside and tell them the following,
- "I really like to be friends with you, but it seems to me that something more is possible between us. How about we go on a few dates?"
- "We are good friends, but my feelings for you no longer fit into the framework of friendship. I really want to invite you on a date."
Sometimes even a simple, “How about a date next Thursday?” is enough. Any time is suitable for a date if a person does not experience a personal tragedy or a turning point in life. Act and do not wait for the right time!
5. Accept any result. If feelings are mutual, then nothing will prevent you from starting a romantic relationship. In case of failure, you need to move on. Persistent offers to have a date, requests for a second chance or ostentatious indifference will only prevent you from regaining your friendship.
If you think that friendship can be restored, you should take a break from seeing each other. After a couple of weeks, try to resume communication. Do not expect that you will be able to become best friends again, but time will help you understand your feelings and continue your friendship.
Some people are not eager to continue the friendship after the romantic impulses. Unfortunately, this risk always exists when trying to change the status of your relationship.